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Celebrating small kindnesses and basking in the little things.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Advice

Polonius gives Laertes advice when he sends him off to school.  He encourages him to not dress to flashy, to not borrow or lend money, to listen to others but be mindful of sharing his opinion with others, and he ends with the following: "This above all to thine own self be true."

You are about to embark on your own journey.  Think about all of the advice that has been given to you.  What advice will you remember?  What advice is repeated and why does the repetition matter?  Think about why this advice is given, and what is the hope in sharing this advice with you?  Tell us a little story about the advice.

My example:
My senior year of high school my grandmother and I were breaking beans for dinner.  We sat at the kitchen table, and I was excited to tell her that I was getting the Louie Armstrong Award for Jazz Band.  I was incredibly excited and proud.  My grandmother never looked up from her beans.  She simply stated, "Pride goeth before a fall."  My only response was silence.  I didn't know what to say.  Later, I told her that I wasn't being boastful, just excited that I was getting the award.  

I have never forgotten that advice.  To never be too proud.  There is a line between pride in accomplishments and arrogance.  I always will have my grandmother in my ear to keep me in line.  She reminded me to be humble in accomplishments and to recognize the lesson in every situation.  



33 comments:

Sean McClain said...

My father isn't quite the sentimental man, though he an be quite poetic when he wants to be. On the morning of my 18th birthday, however, he decided that poetry was not the proper way to induct me into manhood. As I lay sleeping peacefully in my bed, he opened my door rather unceremoniously (and with a loud crash), jolting me from my reprieve.

I could make out his frame in the light of the hall, and I believe I sleepily mumbled, "You could have waited for me to get up to wish me a happy birthday."

My father, hallowed be his wit, simply intoned, "I didn't come in here to wish you a happy birthday. I came in to tell you that now you can legally be tried as an adult. Don't f**k up!" He then left, shut the door, and started making breakfast. Good bacon and waffles, I remember.

Yeah, my family is weird. We make it work though.

Unknown said...

When I was younger, my dad told me a story about when he spent a winter out west. The cold air lashed about and the road was frozen. He drove down the narrow one way road, which had a deep abyss on each side of it and had no guard rails. He somehow spun out of control and his heart began to race. He tried to realign the car with the road and was failing. He realized that there was nothing more that he could do to save himself... so he let go of the wheel. The car realigned with the road and he made it across safely.

Once he was done with his story, he set down his cup of coffee and said, "So when you realize that there is nothing more you can do, let go. Leave it in God's hands, for he has a plan for you.".

He never repeated this phrase, but I repeat it in my head whenever I feel stressed or overwhelmed. It reminds me that not everything is in my control and things will eventually work themselves out in the end. With this bit of advice, I learned to have more trust in my own abilities and to have faith.

hallie314 said...

A couple years ago, on some major holiday, Thanksgiving or Easter I think it was, my Nana and I were in her kitchen getting ready for the meal. I don't remember exactly how we got on the topic, but I'll always remember her saying to me that day, "No matter what happens, you just have to keep rolling with the punches. Go with the flow. Life will be much easier that way." As someone who loves to plan things I just smiled and agreed to make her happy.

Turns out that my Nana's advice came at just about the right time. High school happened, and I realized more and more every day that things never work out the way you plan. You slack off and almost fail classes. You fall in love with people you swore you never would. Your best friend that you planned on living with in college just passes you in the hall now. Things change all the time. I've learned that plans are more of guidelines than anything. Nothing in life is ever set in stone. I guess it's a good thing though. It's a lot more exciting just winging it.

-Riczo 5-6

Unknown said...

Way back in first grade I had an amazing teacher, Mrs. Mann. I remember her having a sign hanging in her room that read “Be The Best You Can Be”. Now, I have heard this phrase from many people while growing up, but for some reason this specific instance is the one I remember the most. She would say these words on a daily basis; over and over again. Yes, it did get repetitive but this wisdom was something I would live by for the rest of my life. My teacher wanted nothing but the best from each and every one of us. She knew that if we lived by this motto then we could accomplish anything.

Unknown said...

This year has been a very hard and emotional year for me. I've dealt with a lot of outside school problems. At times I would think to myself "why me?". The best advice I have gotten and still tell myself repeatedly is "God has a plan for you. He will never put you through something you cannot handle and will lead you to bigger and better things". My dad told me this before this year, but has stuck with me and helped me get through the hard times because I have the hope and faith all things will turn out as they should. I cannot control anything. I am thankful to believe in such strong advice.

Unknown said...

My father and I have always been close and he's always had advice to give me. A few months before he passed away, he told me to always remember who my true friends are. He told me, "When you fall in the fire, only your true friends will get close enough to it to piss out the flames." I'll always remember that, even though Im not quite sure what it means.

Nick Morton said...

Being negative can sometimes be a lot more easier that being positive. However, the lasting effects of that negativity can due bad on us as humans.
I got my advice from my sister. It happened after a cheer competition. Unfortunately our performance didn't go to well and I immediately started pointing out flaws of everything the team did wrong, including myself. I became so upset. My sister had told me to be happy with my performance. She said to find the silver lining in the clouds, otherwise you'll always be pulled down by the negative. This really helped me realize that yeah, we sucked that day. We didn't do our best, however focus on what we did do good on, and make it our motivation to do better at the next competition rather than just throwing a pity party and being a negative Nelly.

Nick Morton said...

Being negative can sometimes be a lot more easier that being positive. However, the lasting effects of that negativity can due bad on us as humans.
I got my advice from my sister. It happened after a cheer competition. Unfortunately our performance didn't go to well and I immediately started pointing out flaws of everything the team did wrong, including myself. I became so upset. My sister had told me to be happy with my performance. She said to find the silver lining in the clouds, otherwise you'll always be pulled down by the negative. This really helped me realize that yeah, we sucked that day. We didn't do our best, however focus on what we did do good on, and make it our motivation to do better at the next competition rather than just throwing a pity party and being a negative Nelly.

Paul Matsko said...

My dad always tell me this "learn from other peoples mistake so you don't have to make them yourself". I really believe his words and I try to follow them a lot. If other people are getting in trouble its a matter of time that I will also if I keep doing the bad things that people do. I can learn a lot from other people just from talking to them and seeing what they regret of doing or what they have wished they could of done when they were younger. Learning from other people makes me feel better about myself because I know what I can and cant do without making a mistake like the first person did. But at the end of the day we are all people and we all make mistakes. Its the fact that we learn from them and better ourselves, that's why learning from other people makes you think how to prevent that mistake from happening.

Unknown said...

The advice that I live by is "Think before you act". My parents told me this advice as I was starting high school. They told me this saying that I will experience many things now that I have the ability to choose my own choices and actions and to think things through. I live by this advice daily because it has helped me down what I believe is the right path for me and has helped me stay out of trouble in the past.

Unknown said...

Advice I often receive is from my father. His famous line is as follows; “Work smarter. Not harder.” This bit of advice follows me whenever I am completing a task. My dad is a smart man and he is always finding ways to make things easier to do so naturally I try to do the same. Sometimes, actually most of the time the quickest simplest way to complete something requires more work to be done, thinking about how to do something before rushing in to do it can save a lot of time and effort. That is why the piece of advice my dad gave to me long ago will stick with me forever.

Unknown said...

My grandma is my favorite person in the world, one of the reasons for this is because of how intelligent she is. I remember on the way to my first swim practice ever, she told me a story about how when she was my age she decided to become a cheer leader even though her parents were against it. She explained the difficulties she had to go through at first: making new friends, keeping a positive attitude, and working extremely hard. That is when she urged me to explore my boundaries and to try new things. I remember how empowered those words made me feel. That first practice was one of my favorite because of how brave i felt even though i didn't know a soul. This advice will always stay with me especially going into college next year.

Unknown said...

Recently I got some of the best advice from my parents. I had been dealing with some "guy issues", and my parents told me that I need leave my expectations super high and know my own worth. I am super grateful for this advice because I know how much my parents love me and that they want the best for me, and they want me to want the best for myself. I know I'll keep this advice in my mind whenever I run into a problem like this again, or better yet, prevent It from happening again. And now that I'm out of the relationship I was in, I am happier knowing that there is someone out there who will treat me well and want the best for me.

Unknown said...

This year has been an emotionally and overall hard year for me. I've had to deal with a lot of my problems that aren't necessarily school related, and for the longest time I wanted to just ignore everything and act as if it was o.k. With graduation approaching I've had to stand up and face the problem head on. The outcome was worse than I expected, and the advise that seemed to be repeated and helped the most was: "some people are not meant to be in your life, no matter who they are. At the end of the day you have to do what is best for you".
At times I want to turn around and take everything back and do what might please others, but then I remember the advise given to me, and it's easier to understand that I did what needed to be done. While the future may be unknown, the advise that is given to me is what helps me prepare for what else I might have to face.

Unknown said...

My dad has a short list of things that he says never to do. They don't apply to everything, but I certainly like to keep them in mind.

"Stay out of the way of things that are bigger than you."
"Don't buy meat off the side of the road."
"The rest I'll tell you when you're married."

I can tell that this list has been shaped by many of my dad's experiences. I know that he had one too many injuries and one too many long road trips with not enough food and not enough bathroom stops. He is still adding onto that list to this day. I hope to be able to live by that advice and add my own experiences to it as I grow older.

Unknown said...

My mom has told me this multiple times, but I remember one time more than any other times. I had taken a panoramic picture of mrs. perrins' class and told my mom that I was one of the seven people that were in my class that day. My mom was proud that I went to school on senior skip day. She told me "Be a leader, not a follower". She has told me that for as long as I can remember and I will always remember that. I will do what I believe in, and what I want to. It is better to make your own rules, rather than follow what everyone else is doing. It is better to be yourself and to express your opinions, than to just go along.

Unknown said...

Growing up my parents always imprinted into my mind that, "Honesty is always the best policy". I value this advice, because honestly, who likes a liar, or wants to be labeled as one. I don't see a reason in lying because more then likely in the end someone will find out, and you have no defense. Many, many, times while growing up I thought that if I lied to my parents it would keep me from getting in trouble. But, parents always have a way of finding out the truth. So eventually over time I learned that to not even try anymore. And now I value honesty, I carry that advice in all that I do. With my friends and in my place of work, I think people deserve to know the truth. Using this advice it betters myself, I become more dependable and responsible, and I like that feeling. I am thankful that my parents gave me that advice at a young age because honesty is truly the best policy.

Erin Janecko said...

Growing up, I was always receiving different advice from my parents. The best advice I've ever received was from my mom, a few years ago. She told me that "other people's opinion of you is none of your business." This advice helped me to stop caring so much about other's opinions of me, and that their opinions really shouldn't matter that much to me. I think this, along with a few other things, has helped to become confident and secure with myself.

sami said...

Some of the best advice I've received was from my friends mom. She said, "Tomorrow's another day, everything looks better in the morning, take my word for it." When i become overwhelmed or stressed, I think about this. Even in the worst moments, I always remember that tomorrow is a new day, and holds new and better experiences. To live in happiness, is to look forward to better days, not focus on the negative.

Unknown said...

"There is always something to buy"

Before my grandfather passed away that was the advice I would always get from him. And now to this day I've received that advice all the time from my father. To me personally the advice is not just saying that you'll always have something to buy, but that you have to look at what you can get, and when you've looked at what you can get you go and look for something better for yourself. No matter what you have and what you can get in life there will always, always, always be something better for you and you and only you can go and 'buy it'.

Jesse Marinaro said...

My mom always tells me "success is not the key to happiness, but happiness is the key to success". She knows all I want in life is to be successful which always stresses me out. She tells me this so I understand that I need to not worry about the stresses in life but to first be happy and enjoy my life then the success will eventually come into play it's self. I realize that if I work hard enough and enjoy the little things in life everything will work out alright.

Unknown said...

My parents have always given me advice on anything i ask from them but there is never real a special quote that sticks out that they gave me. They never were poetic or trying to be a philosopher. They just taught me to be respectful to others and always keep an open mind. I feel I do have an open mind because i do not judge people. People can do whatever they want and if other people don't like it then oh well but at least it makes you happy. No one should ever make you change if you don't want to. Whatever you want to do you should do and forget what anyone else says or thinks. I think the most important advice they gave me was to just be happy. That's all people ever want to be in life so why stop people from getting there.

Unknown said...

Growing up I would always look up to my grandma. To this day he has always had a huge impact on my life. Unfortunately he is no longer here with my but I will never forget the words of advice he would always give to me. Whenever I was feeling down or upset he would always call me up on his lap and he would say to me, "Don't let the world upset you, focus on the things that make up happy, rather than unhappy." Although I was a little girl at the time, whenever I'm going through something or am just super stressed, I think back to me sitting upon his lap and him telling me this. To focus on the things that really matter in life and the things that make you happy. Because if you just focus on all the negative in life, that will more often become the outcome because that is your focus. So always think of the good in your life, rather than dreading on all the bad.

Unknown said...

My mom has always been my biggest role model and biggest supporter in everything that I do. One day while I was really stressed about college and making a decision on my major, my mom told me to just follow my heart and that no dream is too big. She repeats this often now just to remind me that she will always support me and be proud of me for everything that I do. This is important advice because while choosing a major, you need to follow your heart. It’s not all about how much money you will be making, its about being happy at your job each day.

Andy Hoza said...

A lot of changes happened to my home life in the last year and its been very stressful and hard. I have pretty much been living alone and i have to learn that only i can decide how happy and successful i want to be. With work and school the weeks are very exhausting but just taking life one day at a time makes things easier.

Unknown said...

The most important advice I've been given is from my mom. She always tells me to just be myself. This is so important, especially today, so many people change around you and it's so important to stay yourself. You should never feel the need to change who you are because of others. I know I won't get very far in life and will not be truly happy if I don't stay true to myself. You should not ever feel the need to let others opinions influence you, but rather think about what you want.

Richie Norman said...

From the years of playing sports and to having close bonds with family and friends. The most common advice that I have been told was "never stop chasing your dreams" this means so much to me because people tend to give up a lot on many things because of how hard it is. Nothing in life is easy and it took me awhile to realize that. I may be lazy most of the time but I am beyond motivated when I have to be. Its all about pushing yourself and being self motivated when times are tough.

Unknown said...

Myself as a person am a really influential person, at least I try to be. I recognize the difference between being cocky and confident. I always believe in achieving great things through working hard because I like to see results and it just makes me feel more successful when I earn it rather than if it was given or I was helped. My point is that all the advice that I have heard and been given is mostly just things that I have learned and realized rather than things that have been said to me, but there is one thing that was said to me that will never leave my mind. When my grandpa Taylor was in the hospital right before he died, I didn’t know he was going to pass away because he was getting healthier. But he told me: “good luck”, and a couple days later he was gone. That one simple phrase or comment: “good luck”. It just has so much meaning behind for being only two words and eight characters long, but it is something that I will keep with me for the rest of my life. My Grandpa wanted to see me succeed, and that is what I will do.
Cody Taylor 3rd period

Marissa Jenkins said...

Since I was a child I have always been on the move. My mom said I would always be climbing things and never wanted to be held because I was always on the move. As I got older my busyness stayed with me, booking myself down to the very minute. My mom gave me the advice, "Haste makes waste". Referring to not rush through things because it will create waste, resulting in having to re-do what I had already done. I think about this when I'm running around trying to get everything together when my schedule is tight. I remember to take my time, as much as I could, and pace myself trying not to make more work for myself.

Unknown said...

I have been given a lot of advise in my life and have probably only listened to about ten percent of it. Why I do that I will never understand. I've been giving advice as to which you trust and I didn't watch and would pay the favor for thatve

Unknown said...

Mr. Wardeska is one of the only teachers in my high school career that has stayed a part of my learning experience the whole four years. Although sometimes he gets angry, I look up to him more than anyone because of the things he says. One piece of advice that I remember clearly is he always tells us to follow our hearts. Whenever he says this, it always means so much to me. I get nervous about the future often, and when I hear this, it puts me at ease. I know that I will be successful if I just follow my heart.

Anonymous said...

My whole life I have never really liked school. I would always do enough just to get by. I had the average grades such as B's or C's and my parents would still get angry at me for it. I knew I hated doing the work so I would always complain back to them saying how it is average and that I will be fine. My grades to this day still aren't the best, but I keep in mind something my dad said to me one day. He told me "never settle for average". I honestly feel school isn't as important as society claims it to be. My feelings towards school cause me to not try my best in it which is the result of my still average grades. That advice my dad gave me is stuck in my head. I'm using that advice to pursue my dreams of opening my own business. I don't feel like I'm made for the daily "average" American job, so I want to start something up and hopefully I evolve it into something great.

Unknown said...

My grandmother is my idol. I follow everything she tells me, and walk in her foot steps. The best advice she had ever given me was to be myself, respect those who judge you, and always forgive others. I used this advice for everyone I met, and learned that forgiveness is the key to happiness.